New Strides and Slackerdom

I still haven't taken him in for therapy sessions. I know. I'm horrible. Of course his health and his eating is EXTREMELY important to me. But life is busy. Life is exhausting. And I keep convincing myself that maybe he doesn't need it after all.

The good news is, Ayden is making progress. He is now 32 months old so he has some basic reasoning skills. This does not mean (in ANY way) that he is a reasonable person. He is still very much a toddler. Toddlers are not reasonable. Teenagers are not reasonable... somewhere in between they're briefly reasonable and if my children are anything like me, they will never be reasonable again.

Anyway...

Ayden has been (grudgingly) allowing me to talk him into fruits and vegetables at almost every meal. No, he's not eating a whole banana or a large helping of broccoli yet, but the fact that he will not only touch it but TAKE A BITE and CHEW and SWALLOW it... that's enough for me right now. Today I got him to eat two dried pineapple bits. True, they're kinda sugary, but they are better than NO pineapple bits. He also (on his own) put a dried cherry in his mouth. Yep, we were revisiting dried fruit today.

So this is good news. It is progress. And I am grateful! <3

Oh and another notable change... I think Ayden is done nursing. He nursed once on Thursday, not at all yesterday and not at all today. The one time he asked today, he was easily redirected. I have mixed feelings. Of course I'm glad that he's independent and confident enough now that he doesn't feel he needs it. And of course, I'm glad to once again be the only one who can claim ownership to my body... but part of me worries that he won't get all those nutrients that he was getting from me. It is the main reason I didn't try to wean him sooner. I'll also miss those times when we would just stop whatever we're doing, sit, relax and snuggle. Of course we can still do these things, but I have a feeling he will be too busy for that all too soon.

YAY!!!

I just talked to the insurance company (yes I'm a bad, bad mommy for procrastinating, but I just hadn't had the time during business hours to call) and after the deductible is met, they will cover 100% of his weekly visits (provided there is medical necessity, which there is)! WooHOO!!!

Slow Progress

So we've been taking the suggestions from the Feeding Clinic and applying them the best we can to daily life.

About two weeks ago at daycare Ayden ate TWO hamburger patties and tried everything on his plate! We were very excited! However, on Sunday he didn't want to have anything to do with his burger... not sure what the difference was, but I wasn't going to press it.

Other than that, there has been little progress... but I will take any progress we can get!

I Could Cry Tears of Joy!!!

So today was the first appointment with the feeding clinic. Ayden woke up on the wrong side of the crib and asked to be nursed so we had a nursing session this morning. The feeding clinic wanted him hungry, so he didn't have anything to eat before we left.

When we got there, Ayden seemed nervous. It wasn't his normal doctor's office and it wasn't his normal routine. We were seen first by a nurse practitioner. She was really nice and she took Ayden's weight and height (he's still on the charts and his weight is proportional to his height! :) ).

The NP asked us some questions about routine, techniques, history, etc. Ayden continued to be nervous and was really shy.

Then the dietitian came in. She asked us some more questions and stressed the importance of routine and not eating/snacking outside of scheduled meal or snack times. She also suggested that I cut back on nursing... she suggested I not nurse Ayden in the morning or after daycare. She also suggested that we move the bedtime nursing to a different room and eliminate nursing in the middle of the night (that one is not going to happen... we've tried). The after day care one won't be too hard; he doesn't always nurse then anyway. The morning one... he only does half the time anyway...

After the dietitian, the Occupational Therapist and Speech Therapist came in. They did some sensory tests with him: rubbed his legs, arms and back with a soft brush, rubbed lotion on him and tried to brush his teeth. He continued to be really shy but tolerated most of it well. We sat down at the table and the eating experiment began!

Zelda, the speech therapist said that his chewing and swallowing was great so that wasn't of concern.

Katie, the OT made him some sliver dollar pancakes and put one on a plate with yogurt on the side. Ayden was REALLY happy to see the pancake and proceeded to gobble it up. When he was down to the last bite, she dipped a little into the yogurt. Ayden cried and tried to hand me the pancake. Katie tore the bit of pancake with yogurt on it off and gave the rest to him. He ate it. Of course he asked for more. The next one she dipped in yogurt right away. He started whining right away but she told him it was okay and after a little hesitation, he started eating it from the other side of the pancake. Katie moved the plate out of the way and put some yogurt on the table in front of him and spread it around. She was showing him how she was playing with it and drawing in it. He ignored it and ate his pancake. She said it was good that he was able to tolerate it being in front of him while he was eating. Then she put his hand in it and he cried. She wiped it off. He ate more pancake (I think he ended up eating four all together). after she wiped it off... she put his hand in the yogurt again. He started whining again, but she busied herself with preparing the next thing... he continued to eat pancake with it on his hand. They also gave him some sweet potato chips, which he brought to his mouth, but didn't like. They also gave him these veggie chips that looked like french fries. He liked those. Katie made him some ravioli and made sure there was sauce all over the plate. She put some of the veggie chips on top of the sauce and he tried one or two but wasn't happy about the sauce. She then gave him some Goldfish and put THOSE on top of the sauce. He was a little hesitant again, but he ate them... then she made a pile of sauce and started dipping the fishies into the sauce. He was NOT happy about that. He would eat them if they had a very little bit of sauce on it, but wouldn't if they were coated or dipped.

Then they let him eat some more fishies and gave him some water and that was it.

Over all I was encouraged and just about cried when he ate the pancake with yogurt on it... and again when he ate the veggie chips... and again when he ate the fishies with sauce on them. Everyone was REALLY nice and were great with Ayden. They recommended ongoing therapy. We're going to make sure insurance covers it and try to find a place close to home for the weekly therapy.

Anyway, I shared this info with the daycare too, and they're also encouraged. They also said that yesterday he ate all his cereal (usually he just eats the dry parts on the top - I assumed the gave it to him separately). :D

I feel so relieved and excited! I hope things continue to improve!!! <3

Tomorrow is the Day!

Our first appointment at the feeding clinic is tomorrow! I am excited and a little nervous.... I'll post tomorrow with news of how it went!

Quesadillas!!!

He ate QUESADILLAS!!! For lunch today at daycare they served quesadillas. Usually, he asks for just plain tortillas but he asked for MORE CHEESE!!!! Then, as his teachers watched in stunned silence, he tried a few bites of shredded LETTUCE!!! I think this is the first veggie he has eaten in nearly a year! I am so happy and excited and he hasn't even had his first feeding clinic appointment!!!

Eggs!!!

He ate eggs today!!! Today they served egg "patties" with english muffins at daycare. And he ate THREE egg patties!!! They had to ask him to eat some of his MUFFIN before he could have more eggs!!! I am ecstatic!!! For lunch they had chicken nuggets and he ate that of course. So he's a happy guy this afternoon!!! And I'm a happy mommy!!!!

A few small victories....

This week/weekend, Ayden ate a bunch of blueberry pancakes (probably 4 or 5) and fish sticks. I know he's eaten fish sticks before, but only one other time that I know of. So this is good!!! Granted, these are food TYPES that he already eats, but I'll take victories any way I can get them! Go Ayden!!!

The First Appointment....

...has been scheduled. He will be going into the feeding clinic at Children's in mid-July. Even though it's a month away, I'm excited to be moving forward.

Last night Ayden went nuts with nuts! He was gobbling up pistachios faster than I could get them shelled and chopped! He even tried to put a couple in his mouth with the shell still on! He won't always eat them, but when he does, he REALLY eats them! He also ate some Texas toast. Nuts and bread for dinner.... At least he ate something. And nuts are good for him!

Unless there are huge strides taken before his first appointment, I probably won't be back to add more. I'm kind of a slacker like that. :)

I'm a Slacker

Oops! I forgot to get on to enter the last two days of Ayden's food journal:

Friday, June 4, 2010

3am - Breastfed
15 minutes

Snack - 6:25am
1/3 c organic cereal snacks
1oz water

Breakfast - 8:30am
4oz milk

Snack - 10:00am
handful of Goldfish crackers

Lunch - 12:00pm
2 slices of white bread
4oz whole milk

Snack - 3:45pm
8 organic graham cracker sticks
6oz water

Breastfed - 4:40pm
5 minutes

Dinner - 5:10pm
2 chicken strips
5 french fries
6oz water

Breastfed - 7:45pm
20 minutes




Saturday, June 5, 2010

Breastfed - 12:15am (ugh)
15 minutes

Breakfast - 7:30am
1 waffle
2 oz whole milk

Breastfed - 10:20am
10 minutes

Lunch - 11:05am
1 1/2 chicken nuggets
3/4 waffle
3oz water

Breastfed - 12:20
20 minutes
1oz water

Snack - 3:20pm
11 organic graham cracker sticks
6oz water

Dinner - 6:20pm
2oz whole milk

6:30pm (after refusing to eat pizza)
5 3/4 chicken nuggets
2 oz whole milk


So, everything is all filled out and I'll get the packet shipped back to the Feeding Clinic first thing Monday morning. Keep your fingers crossed!

Daily Food Journal - Thursday, June 3, 2010

Breastfed - 5:45am
10 minutes

Breakfast - 8:10am
2 Tbsp Rice Krispies Cereal
1/3 c Whole Milk

Snack - 9:45am
3 Animal Crackers

Lunch - 11:50am
2 bites of a bun
2oz Whole Milk

Snack - 3:30pm
2 Animal Crackers
4oz water

Breastfed - 4:10pm
10 minutes

5:20pm
3oz Water

Dinner - 6:45pm
7oz Milk
95% of one slice of Texas Toast

Breastfed - 7:45pm
10 minutes

:(

What Will He Eat?!!?!

The Feeding Clinic included a comprehensive checklist in their handy dandy HUGE packet they sent to my house (seriously, the postage on this thing cost like $2).

So here is a list of what Ayden will eat:

Bread (most types)
Toast
Bread sticks
dry cold cereal
cool ranch Doritos
most types of crackers
blueberry glazed cake donuts (no filling)
french toast
poppy seed, blueberry or orange muffins
pancakes
waffles
chicken nuggets
peanuts
pistachios
whole milk
water
rice krispie bars
syrup

No fruits
No vegetables
No meats/proteins (outside of the chicken nuggets and nuts listed above)
No dairy (outside of milk)
VERY few "treats & sweets"
No nutritional drinks (like Pediasure)
No vitamins
No condiments (except syrup)
and DEFINITELY no combination foods like sandwiches, pizza, casseroles, etc.

I'll post his daily food journals to illustrate how little he actually eats

What I Wouldn't Give for a Vegetable!!!

For my toddler that is. I enjoy a small variety of vegetables. I love fruit. My (almost) 27 month old... well that's a different story.

Since this is my first blog entry about the journey that I've found myself in the midst of, I'll take you in from the beginning...

My little guy (Ayden) was born two days before his due date. He was a very healthy 9lbs 9oz and was 20 inches long and had a gargantuan noggin (thanks honey for passing that onto our boys - I am the one who has to birth that head after all!)

I began nursing him within minutes of his birth and boy did that boy nurse! I recall one marathon nursing session that lasted in excess of six hours. Straight. No breaks (unless you count the few seconds to a minute where I either switched sides or tried to reason with my newborn that he really wasn't THAT hungry - who knew newborns don't listen to reason... funny my 15 year old doesn't either, but I digress).

Anyway, I have been very blessed that all of my children have been healthy and happy. Ayden was no exception. He gain weight steadily, met his milestones on time (sometimes a little early) and was generally a happy baby. When he was about 6 or 8 weeks old, I decided to become the better mother that I had wanted to be for all my boys but always seemed to fall short. I figured I had the time to delve into it, since I was now able to be a stay at home mom and didn't need to juggle work, family and ME time. I switched to organic foods where ever possible including almost all of our produce. I also began my obsession with cloth diapering (but that's a whole different blog). I only wish I had cloth diapered my older boys!

When Ayden began eating solids, of course I chose organic baby foods (I still did not have the time to go 100% and grow my own organic fruits and veggies and blend them to perfect mommy pureed goodness). Ayden enjoyed a variety of foods and like his brothers before him showed a preference to squash and sweet potatoes. He was a GREAT eater! We began to introduce finger foods: cheerios, etc. He seemed to do well with them after a little practice. He started drinking out of a cup and once he got the hang of that, enjoyed a cup of water with his meals and snacks.

When he was gobbling all of the 1st foods and wanting more, we moved to the 2nd foods. You know, bigger jar, a little chunkier texture but still that pureed stuff you try not to wrinkle your nose at while you spoon into your little guy's mouth? Yeah, that's the stuff! He liked it and was soon polishing off a jar and wanting more. So we attempted the 3rd foods. Bigger chunks, more foods mixed together and even more attempts to not wrinkle your nose. Ayden didn't tolerate it very well. He was almost a year at this point. I'm not 100% sure because I didn't think to document it - it really wasn't a big deal. So we continued on with the 2nd foods and tried to introduce more table foods. He had his top and bottom front teeth by this point and was working on some molars. We tried feeding him a little of what we were eating and he usually ignored it and favored his baby food and cheerios. Again, I wasn't concerned.

This continued until he was about 12 or 13 months. At that point, I brought it up with our pediatrician, almost in passing. I was mildly concerned that he wasn't moving on to table foods and self feeding (not that he wasn't capable, he put those cheerios down like nobody's business). He had added those organic Elmo snacks by Earth's Best to his repertoire and he seemed to like goldfish crackers. He'd also sneak some M&M's whenever mommy was sneaking them... I can't blame him on that one. I'd like to sneak some M&M's now....

Where was I?

Anyway, we knew that he COULD self feed, so that wasn't the issue. The ped said that as long as he wanted to eat baby food to let him. He was still gaining weight and growing (albeit more slowly, but this is the trend for my boys, come out with huge heads and chubby cheeks and thunder thighs only to slim down to the skinny little things.... strangely their heads still remain massive). So we continued to offer him table food and spoon feed him baby food. He would occasionally "help" and while it was messy, I acknowledged it was an important part of learning how to be an independent eater so I let him get messy.

A few months later, he started refusing baby food. He'd eat a bite or two and then clamp the ol' jaw shut and refuse to open it. He still wasn't touching the table foods we were offering but continued to munch away on his Cheerios, crackers, and "Elmos". Hmmm... Now I WAS concerned. You know that saying "he won't starve himself"? It implies that toddlers are more stubborn that we are (whoever said that must not have met ME), but will eat when they're hungry enough. I tried and I tried, but the kid apparently was never "hungry enough". I brought it up with the ped again about a month later when I realized the "phase" wasn't short enough for my liking. He suggested vitamins and to stick to my guns about not caving in and letting him eat only what he wanted.

I couldn't give him vitamins though because the liquid stuff he could smell a mile away and he wouldn't touch his milk if it had some in it. I couldn't mix it in applesauce or anything because he wouldn't EAT applesauce. I asked my ped again what to do and he referred us to a feeding clinic.

We called the feeding clinic and they sent us a HUGE packet of paperwork they wanted us to fill out before they'd even schedule an appointment for us. UGH. So I set out to work on the packet.... but it was riddled with questions about J-tubes and special apparatuses needed for feedings and other "extremes" that I feel blessed never to have dealt with. I began to wonder if this was really the right line of "treatment". He had also just started at daycare because I had needed to return to work when he was around 6 months old and our nanny was no longer working out for us :( so I thought maybe the socialization and "peer pressure" would help/solve his problem.

At this point, Ayden was about 18 months old and still nursing several times per day. Which was fine with me; I've always believed in child led weaning. My oldest weaned around 2 and my middle son weaned at a year.

So the "peer pressure" didn't work. Maybe I should be glad. This may speak wonderfully for when he's a teenager and faced with a difficult situation!

By the time Ayden's 2 year check up came around, I revisited the issue with our pediatrician. He said that he too wasn't sure if the feeding clinic was the right avenue for us to pursue so he had taken it upon himself to call them and find out if this was something they could help us with (LOVE our ped by the way). He assured us that they deal with a broad spectrum of eating disorders/problems/quirks.

So I've been dragging my feet for the last three months. Finally, I called the feeding clinic and and them resend the mega packet and I filled it out last night. The only thing that needs to be completed is the 3-day food journal, which I sent to the daycare this morning. They're going to fill it out during the day today and tomorrow and I will fill it out for this evening and tomorrow evening as well as all day Saturday. I'll mail the packet in on Monday and wait for a call so I can schedule our 1 1/2 hour appointment (which we need to arrive early for, so really it will be at least 2 hours).

Ayden is still breastfeeding, though only 2-3 times per day now and not for very long (maybe 10-15 minutes per session). He's still eating a select few foods (I'll give a full list in a later blog post, this one has become exceedingly long!) and is still growing and gaining weight... but slowly.

So there you are. If you have an extremely picky eater of your own... rest assured that you are not alone and your concerns are valid. Ignore the people who roll their eyes and scoff when you express your concerns about how little they eat or how little variety. SOME picky-ness in toddlers is normal of course, but to the extreme... there may be something else underlying.

I'll update as I go on this journey so that any readers (anyone? hello?) will know that they're not alone in this frustrating journey.

And if you made it this far.... you must be at the end of your rope ((HUGS)) or a friend of mine.